02 October 2009
Posted in Reviews
Image Courtesy of Evan Romine
Who is Swinggcat? Well he's a successful "pickup artist". This gives him a great deal of knowledge in the area of approach and the whole game of "dating".
This attraction ebook is very similar to other material from David Deangelo and Mystery.
The book outlines vital area such as body language and the characteristics of a real man. Provides great techniques and ideas which would be useful for approaching/talking to groups of single women, and also gives you ways to overcome your fears with positive affirmations.
Attributes women loath? Attributes they love? Read to find out.
This attraction ebook gives a good understand of what "naturals" think and believe. A natural would be the man who is able to get with any girl effortlessly and make it look easy. It's natural to them.
Would you believe that naturals have beliefs such as:
"I Have the belief that I am better looking than I actually am. I know that I am not as good looking as some men and better looking than others. But I know that I can walk into a room and walk out with another mans girlfriend"
"Women just want to use me for sex"
Swinggcat is someone to check out.
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Swinggcat - Real World Seduction
- Become the prize and stop “gaming” girls but prize them
- Take a strong lead – Strong male dominant
- Have high standards
- Don’t go in to her reality, take her into yours
- Women are turned off by men who try and accommodate them
- Be a challenge
- Have a sense of humour
- It’s useful to reveal some vulnerabilities or weaknesses within the first few hours of meeting her
- Give a vibe of “despite the fact I am not mating with you, my genes will survive because I have so many other opportunities to mate with other attractive women”
- Women like men who are comfortable in their own skin
- Women find men irresistible that are masculine but have a feminine style and sense of humour
- Pushing and pulling – Show interest one minute, next act like you don’t even know her
- Chapter 2 review – page 10 –
- Some of the qualities of men who are the PRIZE are:
- Taking a strong lead
- Having Standards
- making her come into your world
- Making her accommodate you
- Being challenging
- Having a sense of humour
- being vulnerable
- Displaying costly signals
- Being comfortable with yourself
- Being a Dandy
- Being a Rake
- Being a Coquette
Attributes women loath
- Men who seek validation
- Men with a weak sense of reality – They like men who can think for themselves and are assertive about what they think and like
- “I have a belief that I am better looking than I actually am, I know that I am not as good looking as some men and better looking than others. But I know that I can walk into a room and walk out with another man’s girlfriend”
- Believe “Women just want to use me for sex”
- Beliefs that naturals have –
- “I am the prize”
- “Women are wonderful creatures that love sex”
- “I know the woman’s body better than she does”
- “No matter what reaction a woman gives me, it’s always beneficial to learn”
- “When a woman says she doesn’t like something about me, it’s just her issue”
- “I do not need validation, but she is trying to get me to validate her”
- “Every woman wants me; I’ve just got to decide which ones I want”
- “I decide is sex will happen”
- Chapter 4 review – page 14 –
- Beliefs are important in two ways. One is that they set the groundwork for setting strong frames (we will talk more about this in the next chapter). Two is that what you believe becomes your reality. What this means is that our mind is designed to focus its attention on finding real world evidence of our beliefs. Thus, a big part of having women sees you as the PRIZE are about you believing that you are the PRIZE.
Introduction to frames and meta-frames
- A “frame” is a general focus or direction that provides an overall guidance for thoughts and actions during an interaction
- Think of a meta-frame as a giant frame that the other frame fits inside
- Chapter 5 review – page 16 –
- A frame determines the underlying meaning of behaviours, and actions. And a meta-frame determines the overall underlying meaning of interactions. Frames and meta-frames only exist inside the skulls of human beings, not in objective reality. Put in other words, frames and meta-frames are just what a person accepts as their subjective reality. A man is always best off maintaining the meta-frame that he is the PRIZE in an interaction. A woman may or may not buy into his frame, but at least by maintaining the meta-frame he is not buying into her being the PRIZE in the interaction.
Controlling the meta-frame
- Step 1 – Defining the meta-frame
- First step in controlling the meta-frame is to set it
- Step 2 – Assume the meta-frame in advance
- You are the prize
- She is trying to get you to like her
- She wants you so bad that she is trying to get you to sleep with her
- Both of you are going to sleep together but only if she lives up to your standards and expectations
- Step 3 – The art of not choosing her
- Step 4 – Setting the frames that implicate the meta-frame
- Basically use frames that women use on men to try and be-little them
- You are the prize
- Don’t accept second class behaviour
- Chapter 6 review – page 21 –
- There are four steps to setting the meta-frame. The first one is to set the meta-frame: define the overall underlying meaning of the interaction. The way l define it (and you are welcome to custom tweak it) is this: That l am the PRIZE, that she is trying to get me to like her, that she wants me so bad that she is trying to make me sleep with her, and that we both know that we are going to sleep together, but only if she lives up to my standards and expectations. The second step is to assume what the underlying meaning is before even interacting with the woman. The third step is to not choose or only tentatively choose
Part 2 – Prize ability
Displaying Vs. Parading
Chapter 7 – a few words on Style
- Get a good style that works for you
Chapter 8 – How to meet women
- On approach it is normally best not to ask questions
- Initiation example – If you bump into her or she bumps into you say “Ow... you hurt me” then whatever she says then you “I hope you have a good lawyer because I’m suing you”
- Good way to initiate with a woman with a phone is “did he call yet?”
- Opinion opener examples –
- The cheating roommate opinion:
- Say to a woman (or women): "I want your opinion on something...a friend of mine was suspicious that her roommate was sleeping with her boyfriend. So, she went through her roommate’s diary...and low and behold, she was right...her roommate was sleeping with her boyfriend...So, the question is...should she confront her roommate or not?" This conversational opener is great because women, as we know, love gossip and drama. Once you get them started on this, they will not shut up.
- The pug/beagle opinion:
- I started using this opener a few months ago. This is probably my favourite opener because people always get really excited about it. So, here it is. Say to woman (or women): "How well do you guys know eighties pop music? (If they look young, ask them how well they know nineties pop music)...good, because my friend just got a pug and a beagle dog...the pug is a boy and the beagle is a girl. She wants to name them after an eighties pop duo...So, I am trying to come up with names? I was thinking Sonny and Cher because Sonny looks like a pug and Share looks like a beagle but they were in the seventies...Or how about Prince and Carmen Electra? No, that won't work because Prince looks more like a Chihuahua than a Pug. So, girls, I need some names for the dogs."
- Chapter 8 review – page 27 –
- Women will judge you on how you go about approaching them. For this reason, approaching is a big part of PRIZABILITY. There are two parts to the approach: initiating and conversationally opening. Initiating is getting a woman's attention. Conversational opening is getting into a conversation with a woman.
Chapter 9 – Using cold reading
- Tell them they have one side and then the other side is opposite “you have such a little girls smile, it’s so innocent. But I can tell from your eyes that you have a sinister side to you”
- Talk about times when they can be one way, while at others they can be another way. “I can tell that you are someone who at times does not take chances, and sometimes you want to shoot yourself in the foot because you did not have the courage to try something new, but other times you are adventurous and do take chances and this is when you have the best times because it’s the real you”
- “You know what, you put on this whole act of being tough but on the inside, you are really sensitive” Relate – say it’s true of you too, builds comfort/rapport
- Talk about how they appear one way but in fact they are really the opposite way “I bet a lot of people think you are really mature, but I know better. I can tell you from (eyes, facial expression) that you are just a little girl”
- Use the formula “You X because of Y”
- If the woman has her arms crossed “There is really two types of people in this world, actors and observers. I can tell by the way you carry yourself that you are an observer. You might even be one of these people watchers and I know this because your arms are crossed and you are slightly leaning back. Bu, I will tell you something... I bet you are truly happy when you can just let go and be in the moment... right?”
- Don’t use cold reading too much with one girl since it conveys that you are trying to hard
- Chapter 9 review – page 31 –
- Cold reading is reading a person without having any prior knowledge of them. Although women are unique in certain aspects, they share many similarities. This is why truisms and generalities can be applied to most women. The reason few women will realize you are using truisms and generalities is because their own vanity makes them think that what you are saying is unique to only them. Also be vague. This makes you sound more profound, and leads to the woman asking you question, which actually a sign that she is intrigued is. You can be vague by talking about parts and sides of her. For example, you could say, "You look innocent but there is a part you that is very mischievous". Always tie your cold reading into a reason. For example, you can say, "I can tell that you are the sort of person that likes to observe what is going on because you have your arms crossed and you are leaning back". Gimmicks give you a nice context to cold read. However, it is always best to cold read without gimmicks.
Chapter 10 – Storytelling
- Story telling is as important as sense of humour
- Use “You remind me of...” people like to know what
- Don’t brag when telling stories
- Chapter 10 review – page 35 –
- Storytelling is an important skill for displaying PRIZABILITY. When telling stories, always keep the tone light, shallow, and childish. Always use lots of girl humour. Humour in these types of stories always has certain rhythm and flow to them. It is important to know how to transition into stories. Two great ways to transition are by telling the girl that she reminds you of someone or by making a philosophical point. When telling stories always be sure to display PRIZABILITY without parading it.
Chapter 11 – Rapport
- Make sure you already have at least some prize ability before you gain rapport with a woman
- Rapport building – When you find things you have in common such as, likes, dislikes etc – Creates instant rapport
- Making her relate to what you want – Say you like adventurous women, she will start to tell you what adventurous qualities she has
- You knowing better that she knows herself – Demonstrate that you know her better than she knows herself. Shows you understand her
- Chapter 11 review – page 37 –
- "Rapport" the way l am using it is an all-encompassing term for comfort, connection, and understanding. It is a subset of PRIZABILITY, although you usually have to have some PRIZABILITY with a woman for it to be beneficial to get rapport with her. If you are skilled, do things that force her to try and get rapport with you before trying to get rapport with her. This builds PRIZABILITY in her eyes. Two ways of getting rapport with a woman are by finding commonalities between you and her, and by displaying that you know her better than she knows herself. Two great ways of getting her to try to get rapport with you first are making her relate to your experiences, and making her relate to what you want.
Part 3 – Prizing (The art of coquetting)
- Need to hook women on an emotional level
- Getting a woman interested in something then taking it away. Then get her more interested by giving it back
- Open loop – It is anything that is unfinished like a thought, story, emotion or feeling. Cliff hanger
- Creating an open loop in a conversation is powerful – If she asks you questions don’t answer it in full – example – “Where did you travel?” answer with (if it was Spain, say Europe) then talk about what you done there
- Commitment and consistency – Whatever a person commits too, they will usually be consistent with
- “Something about them” open loops – People love hearing about themselves. What is better though is when you know something but don’t tell them. When they bite that bait they will say something like “What do you mean by that?”
- If she interrupts you say “Didn’t your mother teach you any manners? It’s rude to interrupt, you remind me of ... oh never mind I’ll tell you later”
- If she has something to tell you, interrupt her and do something that will make her wait to tell you
- Numerical open loops – Tell a girl there is 3 things you like in a woman and only tell her 2. When she asks what the third is, tell her she is impatient and that she needs patience. Now she will think if that is the third or not.
- Getting them to say what – Say – “you’re such a girl” after something she has said
- Chapter 12 review – page 43 –
- A powerful form of PRIZING is building interest in a person, and then amplifying that interest by taking away the very thing that interested her in the first place. One way to do this is to use open loops. Open loops are great tools for both getting women so emotionally charged that they chase us, and getting them to buy into our meta-frame.
Chapter 13 – Pushing and pulling (art of sending mixed signals)
- “You seem like fun... maybe we will hang out... but only if you have hot girlfriends to introduce me too”
- Pushing is closer to pain (away from you) pulling is closer to pleasure (to you)
- Should be –
- Hint the possibility of acceptance or validation
- Tentatively accepting or validating her
- Validating or choosing a part of her
- Don’t use compliments, flattery or praising as pulling at the beginning
- Should not be you insulting her, being defensive or closing her out
- Should be –
- Hint the possibility of rejection
- Tentatively rejecting or disqualifying her
- Rejecting or disqualifying a side or part of her or her behaviour
- Basic idea is to pull them in by making them feel an emotion or do an action then push them away and make them feel guilty about it
- Guilty Pursuer
- Imply to a woman we should get together. If she bites and suggests we should get together say “I hope you don’t think there is anything between us, I wouldn’t want it to hurt our friendship”
- Grab her really close to you and say “I hope you weren’t trying to kiss me. You are like my little sister and I am hoping that you are not trying to get all incest on me” - When she thinks you’re serious, grab her and kiss her
- If she says “what” demanding to anything, Say “God... your poor parents. I hope you weren’t this demanding as a child”
- The guilty laugh
- Tell them a story that’s unfortunate and when she laughs say “you shouldn’t be laughing, that could bring bad karma and could happen to you”. When she thinks you’re serious, say “it might be fucked up but I agree, it is fucking funny”
- Emotional rollercoaster is another type of push and pull
- Do it by giving her a certain emotion to a situation then giving her the exact opposite emotion to the same situation. Repeat = very powerful
- Tell stories like a good soap opera
- Like being warm with her then lead into harsh/cold
- Example – “You know, you come off as a warm person but you really have a hard time letting people in. Maybe even trusting people and for the most part I don’t like girls like yourself, but you have a friendly smile, so maybe you will get to hang out with me. I am going to have to think if I am going to make an exception for you. I don’t want my other friends to think I hang out with people who are creepy”
- This is the art of doing or saying one thing and doing another thing to completely undermine the first thing
- To do this you must be able to control your emotions
- Example – if she asks “Do you like the way I kiss your neck?” say – “When you kiss my neck, I get so turned on; you are the best” (pull) now push with “Well actually... (Start counting your fingers) four others were also really good too. I guess you are one of the best. Still, you are really good. If she asks “Who are these girls or am I better than these girls?” Say “You are such a girl” or “I don’t kiss and tell”
- Another example (not long after meeting the girl) “Oh my god... you have like the best smile... I have ever seen” After she replies say “(start counting you fingers) Actually, I know four other people who also have really good smiles... so actually you have the fourth best smile... I am going to call you number 4”
- Ask a question and when she is answering say something like “I don’t really want to know, I was just pretending like I cared” I don’t really care, I just wanted to see if you’d tell me”
- This is where you point out a commonality between you two and instead of saying that we are so similar plays it as if we wouldn’t get along because of that reason. “You know, at times you are very sarcastic?” (If she agrees) “Well you have to be careful not to hurt other people’s feelings and that I know this because I am sarcastic too” (this builds rapport because I am pointing a commonality between her and I) (Then you might escalate the rapport by going into a story of when you were sarcastic) “It’s funny but sarcastic people have a weird appreciation for other sarcastic people... and that’s why I like you. But, the both of us combined would be pure evil and together we would tear people to shreds and that is why the two of us should never hang out”
- Chapter 13 review – page 55 –
- Pushing & Pulling is the continuous process of Pushing a girl away from you and then Pulling her back into you. The idea is to never fully push her away from you and never fully pull her into you. The Pushing & Pulling techniques we went over were Guilty Conscience, Emotional Roller Coaster, Revealing & Concealing, Good cop/Bad cop, and Intentional Undermining.
Chapter 14 – Qualifying and Challenging
- Before you can do this you need to follow the steps-
- Step 1 – Believe that you are the PRIZE
- Step 2 – Have enough prize ability –
- If you have the woman laughing, asking you questions or flirting with you then you have enough
- Step 3 – Having standards, expectations and rules –
- Write up your list of standards a woman must have and stick to it. Then write up what you will not tolerate
- Such as they must be –
- Up for a challenge
- Good wit/intelligence
- Not afraid to change
- What not to tolerate –
Qualifying and challenging them
- As soon as you get any sign of prize ability from a woman, you try beginning to qualify her like “You seem like you may be adventurous, are you?” – If she says ”Yes” say – “Good because if you weren’t I was going to walk away since I am only friends with adventurous people... and even though you might be adventurous, I don’t know if this friendship is going to work out because I’m not sure you can handle me”
- Whatever they say, you say “What’s the most adventurous thin you have done in the last year?” Whatever they say “I was starting to think I was a little much for you... but maybe this will work out”
- Can repeat that adventurous act with spontaneous as well
- If they never answered the “ad” or “sp” questions with a sexual answer then ask them “where is the most craziest place you have had sex” - If they don’t answer you can accuse them of not being adventurous and spontaneous
- If she answers the sex question you’d better have a more adventurous story than her because you want it to come off as if you are more adventurous than them
- After these questions you can say “If you were in kissing school, what grade would you say you’d achieve?” (They normally say A) then kiss her, she doesn’t want to be a liar
- Chapter 14 review – page 61 –
- Qualifying & Challenging is a powerful way of PRIZING women. Furthermore, it is really a form of Pushing & Pulling because you are continuously Pushing the girl away from you and then Pulling her back into you. Also, similar to Pushing & Pulling, you are never fully pushing her away but you never fully Pulling her in. Or put in Qualifying & Challenging words, you are never slamming the door in her face, yet you are only tentatively accepting her. There are three steps to really making Qualifying & Challenging work: believing you are the PRIZE, having PRIZABILITY; and finally, having standards, expectations, and rules. Also, Qualifying & Challenging is one of the fastest ways to making a girl buy into our meta-frame.
Chapter 15 – The body language to pushing and pulling, qualifying and challenging and setting frames
- A big part of Pushing & Pulling, Qualifying & Challenging, and setting frames is not just what you communicate with your words, but what you communicate with your body. Some experts estimate that most of our effective communication is non-verbal. So, for example, slouching your shoulders conveys that you have low confidence to people, and thus, can lead to you establishing weak frames when interacting with others. Oscillate between pushing her away or qualifying her by having the body language of a judge, and pulling her in by opening up your body language. When first talking to a woman it is always best to stand at angle. This conveys that you are friendly and not completely closed off to her, yet you are not completely open to her either. Using physical Pushing & Pulling is one of the most effective methods for getting a woman to physically chase you.
Chapter 16 – Role-playing is a powerful tool for prizing
- Role-playing is acting out make believe scenarios. Two reasons why role-playing is so effective on women are that it gets rid of them feeling vulnerable, and even though it is making believe, it is as powerful as if it were real.
Part 4 – Chick tests and Chick frames
Chapter 17 – Types of Chick tests
- Women intentionally doing something to get a reaction out of you and then judging that reaction
- Women unintentionally doing something that gets a reaction out of you and then judging that reaction
- Women judging something you do and/or say
- Chapter 17 review – page 72 –
- Chick tests can be broken down into three categories. The first one is when a woman intentionally does something to test (judge) how you will react. Some of the things they will test for--especially when first meeting them—are whether or not you are the PRIZE, can control the meta-frame, and take a strong lead. The second form of chick test is when a woman does something without the intention of testing you, but ends up judging your reaction to her. Women have been known to do things ranging from interrupting you to doing things for attention to creating unnecessary drama, to complaining about bullshit insecurities. Putting up with these things will often times lead to women judging you in an adverse way? The third type of chick test is when a woman judges something you say or do. Allowing a woman to judge you in an adverse way without doing anything about it can lead to you loosing the woman. In some of the proceeding chapters, we will discuss how to handle women judging you. The other thing to keep in your back pocket is that even when a man is in a relationship with a woman, she will often times continue to test and judge him. The difficult thing is this: women will not tell a man when they are testing or judging him hat would defeat the purpose of the test.
Chapter 18 – Chick Frames
- They do them to prevent them from falling into dangerous situations
- Chapter 18 review – page 74 –
- Many of the objections and resistance women have to going out with or sleeping with certain guys are not because they don't like the guy or even because they are testing the guy but are boundaries they put up as fear of putting themselves in a situation where they might do something they are already tempted to do, yet would regret it in the future. The reason women do this is not that they aren't as sexual as men, but that there are more social consequences for acting promiscuous than a man.
Chapter 19 – Reframing chick tests and chick frames
- You never want to respond to a chick test or frame directly - Never answer any of a woman’s questions in a direct way
- Ultimate reframe “Actually, I was being social. But honey, accusing a stud like myself of hitting on you is not a good way to get me to like you. Try being yourself, it might help... but don’t expect to get into my pants... unless you have a big bank account”
- Chapter 19 review – page 80 –
- Reframing is changing the underlying meaning of a chick test or chick frame in such a way that it not only inoculates the test or frame, but also gets the woman to chase you. One way to do this is called "redefining". There are two way of doing this, the first one is to point out that your behaviour or action—or even the interaction between you and her--means something other that the meaning she assigned it with her chick test or chick frame. The other way of doing this is to point out how the meaning she assigned to your behaviours, actions (and the interaction between her and you) actually fit better with different behaviours, actions, and situations than ones you displayed. The other type of reframing is what l call "apply back to chick". This is when you take a chick test or chick frame and turn it around by applying it back to the woman.
Chapter 20 – Out-framing chick tests and chick frames
- Out-framing is basically creating a bigger frame around the chick frame
Bad intentions framing
- If she says “are you trying to pick me up?” say “you are just saying that to try to get into my pants, pervert. But that is not going to work on me, I need more foreplay!”
- Undesirable Attributes Framing
- If she says “are you trying to get into my pants?” or similar you can say “you are going to scare men away with that line, keep it up, you won’t even be able to get a date on the Internet”
- Chapter 20 review – page 83 –
- Out-framing is to literally create a larger frame around the frame of her chick test or chick frame. Three ways of doing this are bad intentions framing undesirable attributes framing, and consequence framing.
Part 5 – Putting it all together
Chapter 21 – How to run an innocent conversation into a one night stand
- Page 85 for a good insight
This book is currently not available through Amazon. Instead, here are some books which deserve reading which are related to Swinggcat Real World Seduction.
Craig is a 22-year-old student studying psychology at Bournemouth Uni. He runs a dating blog aimed at helping every man get the perfect relationship through the psychology of dating.